So this year, after throwing the idea around for what seemed like forever, I actually ordered a Turducken. I don't know what finally convinced me to, but I wasn't going to let another food opportunity like this pass me by. I did my research online and decided to order from cajungrocer.com. They seemed to get good reviews, and better yet, they were having a sale. I couldn't pass this opportunity up. It was like fate had magically intervened. I ordered it.
Three days later, the package arrived, and I put the bird -- pardon me, birds -- into the fridge to thaw. The package said for every five pounds of bird, it needed one day to thaw. The Turducken weighed about fifteen pounds total and was going to be eaten in three days. Again, perfect.
Fast forward to 7:00PM and the turducken was still in the oven. Thanks to my handy meat thermometer, I knew that the temperature was still somewhere in the 140s and slowly rising. I took the foil off to let the outside brown, and watched intently as the thermometer rose, degree by degree. By the time it was at 160, a small crowd had gathered in front of it, cheering and exchanging high fives every time the temperature went up. Finally, shortly after 8PM, we hit the magic number. Among much jubilation, I removed the turducken from the oven.
And I was upset. Incredibly upset. Because at that moment, I realized that I had spent 25 years of my life without turducken. Until that moment, it seemed insignificant. But now, I knew better.
Each bird was delicious. The stuffing was even more awesome. And the side of bacon-cheese-mashed potatoes that I made from scratch was pretty damn good too, if I do say so myself.
So if you've never had one, you should find an excuse. Gather your friends, have everyone chip in a few bucks, and then you can stuff your faces with several different types of bird. And I highly recommend going with the cornbread stuffing. Cooked inside the bird, it turns into this juicy cornbread paste-type thing, in a good sort of way. When the 13 of us were done eating, this is all that was left:
Two legs, two wings, and assorted scraps. Yes, it was that good. And if I could give one word of advice, it would be to make sure everyone knows to be patient. Allow yourself much more time than you think you'll need to cook it. The packaging said 4.5 should do the trick -- I ended up taking the turducken out of my oven a little more than 6 hours after I'd put it in, and it was cooked perfectly. In other words, it was well worth the extra hour-and-a-half to make sure we didn't get salmonella.
So in all, the great turducken experiment was a resounding success. And even though I've now checked turducken off my list of life eating experiences, it's definitely something I'll be doing again.