Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Wikipedia and the Art of the Fake Blowjob

In yesterday's post, I mentioned how one of the consequences of getting into an immature-off with Sean Avery is that your Wikipedia page gets messed with. What I didn't explore though, were the edits that James Wisniewski's page had gone through since the incident. My bad. I can't just leave you guys hanging like that. Now that Wisniewski has officially been suspended by the league, I now present to you the fine work of the Editors-in-Chief of Wikipedia -- all six billion of them:

First, the mention of the incident as it currently reads:

On October 12, 2010, he was suspended for two games for making an obscene gesture towards Sean Avery.

Well, that's no fun. Let's see what else has been put up:

On October 12, 2010, he was suspended for two games for making an obscene gesture towards Sean Avery, performing fellatio on an imaginary penis.

I just don't understand why they'd get rid of the last part. Are they worried that it's too obscene for Wikipedia? Trust me, there's worse. For example, go to the Wikipedia page on fellatio. Or if you're at school or at work, don't.

On October 12, 2010, he was suspended for two games for making an obscene cock-smoking gesture towards Sean Avery.

Yet another example of Wikipedia removing accurate information for no good reason. I still don't get it.

On October 12, 2010, he was suspended for two games for performing felatio on Sean Avery.

Okay, so this one is just wrong. At least this person's heart was in the right place, even if his perception of the location of Sean Avery's penis wasn't. Besides, we can't all be Mike Comrie.

He recently told the often hated Sean Avery to place his genitals in his mouth. For this it is like Wizniewski will receive discipline.

Grammatically incorrect. And the "his" is ambiguous. Is this referring to Avery's or Wisniewski's genitals? Also, can we expound on the discipline that Wisniewski is likely to receive?

He recently told the often hated Sean Avery to place his genitals in his mouth. For this it is likely Wizniewski will be disciplined, although it is well known that Colin Campbell uses Manatees and ping pong balls to determine who gets punishment and when.

Somewhere in New York City, Colin Campbell sits in a corner office, trolling the internet. "Ah, shit! They figured it out! Quick, edit the page!"

On October 12, 2010, he was suspended for two games for making an obscene gesture towards Sean Avery.

"Perfect."

1 comment:

  1. fellatio wikipedia page nastiest thing i've ever seen

    ReplyDelete